Over the past three years my family and I have been developing a Holiday Plan. My husband and I were in the kitchen one morning. Both he and I were feeling stressed and dreading the holidays, with all the running around and money to spend.
As I looked back I realized that every year I felt about the same–with lack of money and time to fulfill all my commitments. I remembered the overcrowded mall, long lines at retail stores, the unusual appearance in the convenience store with its random dust-gathering household appliances like pasta makers and fondue fountains, the opening of presents by my friends or family members who never quite had the reaction I anticipated, and the decision I regretted when I gave up on staying on budget and said, “Well, Christmas comes only once a year.”.
What triggered the Holiday Plan was my husband’s grunt as he said, “I hate Christmas!” and what was worse I agreed, and we talked about all the reasons we “hate Christmas!” It was scary, and that statement crushed my heart. How could we hate Christmas? We lost the meaning of Christmas and blurred it with all the hype and unbalanced shopping and time spent.
Christmas is the day we celebrate that Jesus Christ was born the son of God. I am grateful for the sacrifices He made so I can have grace and live my incredible journey. I wondered how I could believe that and still have in my heart such doom about December 25.
My husband and I discussed it, and we decided to avoid the mall, not to buy any gifts or send out cards unless our heart was really moved to give, and not to participate in any events that made us feel so much stress that we might utter the words of my husband on that morning. Thus began our Holiday Plan.
For our friends and families we cook dinner or visit and purchase gifts throughout the year that they have asked for or that we know they can use, but if we can’t afford it, we don’t buy it, and if we are looking for a certain response when they open it, we don’t buy it. Our plan saves us money and time and gives us a feeling of giving for the right reason.
The right reason is your own, not mine, but you will know it when you feel it. I can look back at the holiday with a smile, and this year as November approaches I look forward to our traditions and look at the past three years with joy.
Each year it has gotten more and more fun. We got bold and we took it a bit further. Rather than give each other gifts, my son, husband, and I started a fun-filled tradition of going away for New Year’s Eve to spend that holiday together someplace fun and different each year. We love to travel, so our plan was perfect.
The Holiday Plan idea can be dangerous. Just watch the movie Christmas with the Kranks or read the book Skipping Christmas by John Grisham. I loved the book. It came out after our first year of the Holiday Plan. The book made me laugh for obvious reasons. You will see when you pick it up, and if you have, you get it already. Most people do not like it when you go against the norm. Why? Because they want to and are afraid to do so. I, for example, have a problem with people who say “No” when you ask them to do something. That is a different story, but I know why, because I want to say “No,” but if I do, I will feel guilt or fear.
When we first started the plan it was uncomfortable when people told us of their stress or holiday shopping woes and then asked me, “How about you?” I would say we don’t do that anymore, and they replied with a tone of disapproval, “Wish I could do that.” At first I wished they could, too, and then I learned to reply, “You can. You just have to make the decision and do it.” I am a big believer that we all have the same power within us. We just have to tap into it.
Whatever you decide to do, do it with the right heart. I used do things for show, for the crowd, but that was a waste of my time, because it had no meaning. Something that has stuck in my heart is “What I do today is important, because I am exchanging a day of my life for it.” I believe this philosophy and have decided to use my time and energy wisely.
I wish all of you a great holiday season and look forward to hearing about your Holiday Plan. Be faithful, be joyful, and be well.
Siobhan Becker is the Editor-In-Chief for The First-Time HomeBuyer magazine. She can be reached at sbecker@eotopublishing.com.